makeup for mommy

Mommies have no time for dressing up and looking nice, but some times it's important to at least try for your own self worth even if you know your baby loves you what ever you look like. Before I became a mom I loved dressing up. I was a girly girl and still am, but now it's about efficiency. 

I seem to have two mommy uniforms. One, sweater and jeans and two, a dress. Everything goes with jeans and dresses, well they go with my personality. With these two types of uniforms getting clothes on my back takes just a minute. It's really the time putting on makeup that I really needed to cut down. 

My cosmetics routine before becoming pregnant was 15 minutes, not lengthy by any means, but I needed to cut down to 5 (10 minutes less of trying to keep my baby from eating the makeup). What do I use? - mineral foundation, a multi-tasking stick for cheeks and lips, and an eye-liner- 5 minutes tops. 

I started using mineral foundation from before pregnancy so I've tried a few brands including the original i.d. bare minerals, fresh minerals, and super market brand l'oreal. By far the best, in my experience, is bare minerals. Unlike what they advertise I don't think these types of powder foundation look more natural than a good expensive liquid foundation, but what I really love about bare minerals is that it has helped the condition of my skin. As I wrote in a previous blog about baby creams, I sometimes have eczema. After I used bare mineral foundation for about two weeks my skin stopped being so irritated. But more importantly I love the mineral foundation because they go on super-fast so I can keep my hands clean for the baby (it's always when you have your hands dirty that you suddenly need to fish something out of your baby's mouth). 

Best products for baby's (and mommy's) skin

It's really hard to know what products you should buy for your baby, especially when he / she hasn't come out yet. Most people stock some diaper rash cream, baby lotion, and baby wash before baby's arrival, which one is the best one for your baby?

We, like a lot of people, got Johnson's and Johnson's products. These were good enough for us when we were young and they also use them at hospitals. In the end though the diaper rash cream didn't work, the lotion too fragrant, and the wash too dry for my baby's sensitive skin. We searched high and low for what's best and here it is. Aveeno, aveeno, aveeno! Aveeno for everything, except Dr. Smith's diaper rash cream is the fastest healing there is. The aveeno lotion, cream, and wash got rid of our baby's eczema and cradle cap. 

I also have some eczema on my face, and my baby's aveeno cream / lotion got rid of that too. Now I can't go back to using my own grown up face cream any more (move over Elizabeth Arden)! Too bad they don't make anti-wrinkle ones.

traveling with baby: Miami

We went to Miami in Jan 2009 when our baby was 15 months old. We flew there from NYC (see flying with baby blog). We decided to go to Miami because we suspect that we'd be going on kiddy vacations like to disneyland soon enough. On this trip we did made a few arrangements to suit our budget and our baby. 

In Miami we rented a condo on Ocean Drive. It's the only way to have a kitchen without breaking the bank, and boy did we need a kitchen! Our baby was going through a big growth spurt at the time and was eating crazy portions every two hours. With the kitchen we could prepare nutritious meals and snacks without spending too much. There were no nearby supermarkets as such but mini-markets could be found a couple of blocks away from Ocean Dr on Washington. These mini-markets had pretty much everything we needed - fresh and frozen fruit and vegetables, pasta, sauces, wine (not for baby obviously but an essential nevertheless, lol). I think they also had diapers and and baby food but we brought them with us so we didn't look. 

To stay at a rental on Ocean Drive was magnificent, mostly because we could walk to the majority of touristic places and great restaurants. A block from us, right in front of Ocean Drive there's also a kids playground and of course the beach. There are a few kid-friendly theme parks in Miami like the Seaquarium and Parrot Island. I think they're a lot of fun especially for older kids, but personally I think their prices are extortionate. We also went to the metro zoo, it's a 45 minute drive from South Beach, but it was worth the trip. Firstly the entrance fee wasn't so steep and it's huge. It's so huge that we couldn't cover it by foot (I'm sure we could but it would be so long that our baby would be asleep most of the time). For getting around the zoo we rented a safari cycle, which provided at least half the fun. We saw animals that our baby recognized like elephants, tigers, and giraffes, it was great. Neither me nor my husband had been to the zoo since we were small so we were really pleasantly surprised at how well the animals looked and how much space they had. The only complaint we had as parents was that the cafeteria food was not very healthy, but I don't think that bothered our baby much!

One note I must make about traveling to Miami if you are going to take a taxi cab, bring the car seat. It's illegal for a baby /child to ride a taxi in Miami without a car seat unlike many other cities in the US. Apparently some taxis will take you without the car seat but they would hike up the price because if they get caught they'd have to pay a hefty fine. Personally I think they should make it the law in all cities. It's not convenient but it's the safest way.

Sleep disturbance -Teething

Just as I recently wrote a blog about getting our baby to sleep in her own bed, we get sleepless nights, typical! I think it's mostly due to teething pains, so it's fair enough that our baby should feel the need for having us near her at night when pain is apparently worse.

Teething is one of those things that take some guess work from parents, at least for us. Months before her first tooth came, she was extremely congested. As she was only three months old, we took her to the doctors because we thought she had a cold. At first her doctor thought the same, but the symptoms never cleared and never worsened. So after several weeks her doctor simply declared that she just might be teething. We looked for signs like swollen and red gums, but they were rarely there (three nights in seven months).  The only thing that was constant throughout the teething process is sleep disturbance. 

I am not sure if it's the pain wakes the baby up, but I think it's more likely that it makes it harder to fall back asleep during sleep transitions. On top of that there's the congestion that goes with teething. If it's hard for us adults to sleep when we have a cold, imagine doing it when a pacifier in your mouth ... the only place were you can breathe.

So what did we do to help our baby? Sometimes we gave her infant tylenol (acetaminophen / paracetamol) but most of the time we didn't want to if we were not a 100% sure that it was teething pains. Sometimes, if she's already really awake we'd give her teething toys. Most of the time, we just endured it and tried to think good thoughts! Now our baby almost has a mouthful we know it probably won't be long until the good nights are coming again.

An expat life: having a baby in the USA

With all the negative press about the US and it's reputation in the last decade or so one would expect the US to be a terrible place to bring up your children. What we found out is that the US is fantastic for families. We are having a much more positive experience since our baby's arrival than it was just the two of us here. 

Of course there are cons of living here as there would be in any other country in the world. The most obvious is the maternity leave, or near lack-of. I think it may vary from state to state but here in Connecticut you legally get six weeks off, but some companies may extend it to a couple of months. Compared to the UK where you get nine months leave (where we moved from) and Sweden where you get 18 months paid leave (where my husband is from), it is a real shame on the US government. Having said that the American culture is extremely family driven and many parents I know (moms and dads) are able to negotiate to work from home two days a week. In addition, it's relatively inexpensive to live here compared to other developed countries. We certainly would never survive on one person's wages any where else.

Maternity leave aside, our experience here in the US has almost always been wonderful when it comes to our baby. In connecticut where we are people are kind, friendly, and tolerant when it comes to babies and children. Our baby is mixed-race and I feel like people make much less of an issue about it than when we visit Europe. Another thing I really like is that it's almost always obvious that other parents are trying to bring their children up to be the best people they could be, most people are more polite and mindful of others around their children than when alone. I am sure this is true for all parents but it isn't always obvious when you see a parents cussing and smacking a child on the head, which I have never seen here (but have countless times in the UK).

Because many moms in the US chose to stay at home, there are a variety of moms groups and other social groups for babies and young children. Libraries run free story time, mother-goose, arts, and music programs. Libraries also have safe play areas and toys that can be borrowed as well as books. Playgrounds are aplenty in doors and outdoors, especially compared to Europe. It's also true that Americans are talkative, which is great when you are alone with your baby all the time. All in all, we love it here. Our baby is having a great time and when it's time to move away we'll be taking some great memories with us.

traveling with baby: Cape Cod

In June 2008, we went to Cape Cod with our baby. She was  seven months old at the time and we wanted to vacation in a place where we could drive to. We live near NYC, so Cape Cod was perfect. It took us about six hours of driving and breaks to the very tip of the Cape, Provincetown. With a lot of luck and organization, our vacation was really wonderful. This is how we did it.

The car trip: 

We knew that our baby couldn't possibly be asleep for the whole time (she was sleeping two naps a day at the time) so we brought lots of toys, books, and kid's CDs. We took turns driving and entertaining the baby (it takes a lot of enthusiasm from us as she obviously couldn't get out of her seat). For when she was awake we tried to vary the type of entertainment. We had a toy session, reading session, and singing session, making faces session, and of course a session when we took breaks and went to a shop and a restaurant. Luckily I was still nursing her so we had no milk / food issue. We did bring some baby jar food with us for lunch at the restaurant, but otherwise I nursed her in the car before her naps.

We woke her up at the normal time, had breakfast,nursed her and left. After one and a half hours (when I've used up all our entertainment tricks) we stopped for a rest at a motor-side shop. Then I drove and my husband took a turn at entertaining her for another 45 minutes before we stopped for lunch. We lunched for about an hour, I nursed her in the car and soon she was asleep for two and a half hours. That was when we tried to do most of our fast driving. If you've been to the Cape you'll know that it's impossible to drive very fast in the Cape with one lane roads and low speed limits. It was like a race against time but we got lucky and she woke up just half an hour before we arrived.

The accommodation:

We booked an apartment rental for a week. It was our first time not staying in a hotel, but we thought we'd save money by having a kitchen and also we'd be able to make her the pureed food. Of course by the time we went we found out that she preferred the supermarket jar variety to my home-made purees but we're glad we booked the apartment as it was really beneficial to our baby. When we first got there she didn't like the place, she wanted to go home. This changed as soon as we started to do routine things like taking a shower and cooking. She then understood that it was a home from home. 

The area:

We stayed in the middle of Provincetown ... very busy, but it was great. It was a little loud at night but we put the A/C on fan only and that drowned out the noise and we could all sleep through the night every night. Provincetown has an active gay community so there aren't many locals with kids. Having said that it's a really child-friendly town and there were a lot of families about. Everyone was friendly to us and sweet to our baby. There were an incredible amount of dogs, much to our baby's joy and fascination. It was a relaxing place to be. We strolled the streets, look at art galleries (all are baby-friendly), ate out (certainly baby-friendly but I'm not sure if they have kids' food), and of course went to the beaches! We drove to a nearly vineyard and had a tasting (also baby-friendly). We had a day trip to plymouth and visited the Plimoth plantation. 

All in all it was a fantastic trip, we would recommend it to anyone with a baby!

flying with baby

We flew with our baby a couple of times. Twice to Sweden / Denmark from New York when she was 10 and 14 months old, and once to Florida from New York at 15 months old. We didn't buy our baby a seat for any of the trips (we were trying to be economical), but four out of six flights we could put her in her car seat in an empty seat next to us. Having the baby in the car seat was so incredibly helpful, it made the trips so much easier not to mention that it's also much safer for the baby. Having the car seat there helped her to sleep, which made the trip much more relaxing.

Before we bought our first flight, we were how likely our baby would get a seat without a ticket. Then we talked to an a continental airlines employee and were suggested to call up 24 hours before departure or go check in really early and explain your situation to the staff. If the plane is not completely full, the will most likely make sure that you have an empty seat next to you for your child. Regulations for airlines in the US states that car seats can only be installed on window seats so we made sure that we booked a window seat when we bought our own tickets. Sometimes when we got to the airport the staff was not sure how full the flight would get, but we asked to bring along our car seat to the gate anyway. It's a bit annoying to have to carry the car seat all the way through the airport and then have it gate-checked if there's no empty seat for you baby but I think it's worth a try (obviously my husband is the one lugging the car seat). 

When we traveled to Sweden we found out that some countries outside the US doesn't allow gate-checking for the purpose of safety (in Scandinavia they said it was because in winter it gets so icy and slippery). Luckily we had the baby carrier with us!

from breast milk to first finger foods

This is the story of my baby's feeding history from birth to 10 months. Naturally, from birth my baby loved breast-milk. Because food allergies run in our family (my husband is allergic to a long list of different foods) I continued to breast-feed her until 15 months.  In fact she loved her breast milk so much that anything else was always an issue. 

At around five months we were advised to start giving her solids. We were planning to wait until she was six months because of the allergy issues, but she was a big baby and the doctor thought that breast milk alone would soon be too little. So we started off with rice cereal mixed with breast milk, which she hated. Then it got much better with pureed vegetables, especially peas, carrots, and sweet potatoes. But suddenly at around 7 months, the summer arrived, and for some unknown reason she started to refuse all solids! We have heard about this happening to other babies around the same age and suspected that it was a combination of two things. One because it was hot she just didn't feel like eating much, and two because the novelty of eating solids just wore off. At this point, I, a stay at home first time mother, was frustrated. I felt like I tried everything but she just refused. I got her to eat solids a little by fooling her to open her mouth and then put the food in. After a couple of mouthfuls she would start to accept the food, but I was filled with quilt (and relieve at the same time). Luckily she continued to love her breast milk and was still growing like crazy. 

At her nine month checkup we were told to start on finger foods, and that may be she's just an independent spirit and might like to be able to self-feed. I, who had been waiting for this day to come, had started eating cheerios for breakfast in front of her a month prior to get her used to seeing it. When I gave her her first cheerio she was really to jump on it, but unfortunately her body was not yet ready and the poor girl gagged! (Thank God cheerios have holes in the middle and melts in the mouth, that's why they are the perfect first finger food). As expected, the gagging experience put her off, but I kept offering it to her twice a week at least to play with. After about a month her gag mechanism subsided and she was able to have cheerios much to her delight and pride. This came at a really great time because my body was producing as much milk as it could possibly make and that clearly wasn't enough.

how we transitioned our baby to her own bed

Firstly, if you are reading this article then you're probably already co-sleeping with your baby. As you may now, when done safely, co-sleeping is one of the most rewarding experiences you can share with your child. However, there may come a time when you feel that your child or even baby is ready to sleep on his own. There are a few articles as to how to transition your child to his own bed, but I'd like to share our own experience.

For us, the key to listen to our baby. When we first took her home, we were not intent on co-sleeping but neither were we closed to the idea. We tried the crib, then an arms-reach bassinet, and finally when we took her to our bed. A couple of days into the co-sleeping habit she became the happiest baby, even apparently unrelated problems like nursing and gas were solved. 

Every night at her bed time one of us would lie down next to her until she was asleep, then we would sneak out and return when she needed us and/or when it's our own bed time. After she turned a year we started to notice that she slept really well when we weren't around but then started moving and feeling for us when we came to bed. This told me that she may not really need us during sleep transitions anymore and that if she slept better without us it may be time for her to sleep by herself. So we set up a mattress on the floor in her room and I slept next to her for the first two weeks until she was used to the room. After that I'd be there when she falls asleep and then sneak out. She still feels for me in the middle of the night but now at 16 months she can go most of the night (about seven to eight hours) without me. It does take time but for us, it's worth it as we believe a baby should never feel uncomfortable or scared of sleeping. 

I'd also like to make a note that when I first started to sneak out, I jumped at every sound and movement that I could see on the monitor and I'd rush to her - big mistake. It was only when we decided  to be on a different floor when she's sleeping (so we could watch loud action movies, etc) did I realize that she didn't need me all the time. When she moved or sounded like she was crying, I'd run upstairs but then when I got there she'd be asleep again. So that taught me to be less reactive and in turn that probably taught her to self-sooth more often when I'm not around.

Co-sleeping is really wonderful if you can do it safely, and of course if your baby needs it. When my baby is ready (I think when she can be more conversational), we'll let her choose a big girl bed and we'll teach her to fall asleep by herself. That be a really big step for both baby and her parents!